IN MY HAREM
Down in Turkey Pat Malone/Abie Cohen
was selling fancy clothes to anyone who’d wear ’em.
When the Turks were called away to war,
A Turk asked Patrick/Abie if he wouldn’t watch his Harem,
Patrick/Abie said, “With pleasure, I will cover every track,
I’ll take care of ev’rything, so don’t you hurry back.”
Patrick/Abie then sat down and wrote a note
To all his friends at home,
And this is what he wrote:
In my Harem, my Harem, There’s Rosie, Josie, Posie,
And there never is a minute King Solomon was in it,
Wives for breakfast, wives for dinner, wives for supper time;
Lots of fancy dancing, and it doesn’t cost a dime.
In my Harem, my Harem, There’s Fannie, Annie, Jenny,
And the dance they do Would make you wish that you
Were in a Harem with Pat Malone/Abie Cohen.
Patrick/Abie said, “I’ve got a thousand wives
And every one of them has got a perfect figure.
Small ones, tall ones, big as they could be,
There’s some as big as that, and some are even bigger.
That young Turk ain’t coming back until the war is won,
I don’t wish him hard luck, but I hope they steal his gun.
I’m living many happy lives,
How can a man get lonesome with a thousand wives.